"If God never did another thing for you, would you still love Him?"
My husband's question crackled to me over the cell phone static. We were facing our second miscarriage in three months. We'd been so sure this pregnancy was the answer to our prayers and grief. And the situation did not look good. I pulled my car out of the Target parking lot into the rainy day traffic and thought about what he was asking me.
I knew the answer I was "supposed" to say. It should have been an immediate "yes." But in the face of more pain and sorrow, the question deserved some thought. I watched the wipers shove the water back and forth across the windshield. We'd been studying Joshua in our Bible study and our group had discussed that all of the things God did for the Israelites served to reveal more of His character. He revealed His goodness, His sovereignty, His judgment, His strength, and His faithfulness by the circumstances that He allowed to happen in the lives of His creation.
Because He loved His people, He chose to reveal himself in very tangible, practical ways. When he gave Jericho over to the Israelites, he used a completely ridiculous battle plan to prove that He was the protector of his people and that He alone decided who lived where (Joshua 6:1-26). When he punished Achen, he revealed that He is the Great Judge. It was a painful but very powerful revelation of God's character (Joshua 7:16).
Furthermore, I knew that God certainly didn't love ME for my actions, but instead loved me because He knew me and created me. How much easier should it be to love a God whose very character should compel us to fall on our faces in worship and adoration? Our imperfect love of Him will never match His love for us. My ability to love God, even imperfectly, comes only from Him. My pastor once said:
It would be better to pray for faith that would never falter than for deliverance from a specific situation, because tomorrow, the next week, the next month would just hold another circumstance we would need delivering from. Faith, on the other hand, is based in a knowledge of who God is regardless of what we see him do.
In the face of this knowledge, I knew my answer. I knew I was not going to like the next few days and weeks and the sorrow they would hold. But my knowledge of God's character gave me hope that no matter what the future held, He would be sovereign. He would be my comforter. He would sustain me.
And I would get to know Him better.
As I maneuvered through the storm, both literally and figuratively, the knowledge of Him, just Him, really was enough.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Lora Lynn writes about life and laughter in a family with five kids under five at vitafamiliae.com.
Photo credit: scott.liddell.com via morguefile.com
Loading ...
Wow! This was a terrific post! So true. Thanks for being so transparent.
I am so blessed by this post! Thank you. I love what your pastor said…pray for faith rather than for deliverance. It is so true, i always think about how i will respond if i went through a very difficult situation but then i always fall back on the fact that i know the Lord would give me the faith i need to get through it. Thanks again!
Tonight I will pray for "faith that will never falter" because sometimes I waiver and look at the storm, even when I know better. SIGH.
Thanks so much for sharing your story Lora Lynn. I have to do something today and I dont know what the outcome will be but thanks for the reminder that whatever happens, God is good, I can trust Him, and I can get to know Him better through this.