For the most part, my youngest boys – ages 16 months and 2 ½ years – get along well. Sure, we have had the occasional squabble over toys or a snatch-and-grab involving a sippy cup or two, but no major brawls or battles to speak of. That is, until my 2 ½ year old began channeling the spirit of a vampire and started biting.
The fateful day seemed just like any other day on the home front. The kids were wandering back and forth between the living room and their bedroom, playing and watching a little Nick Jr. All was well until I heard a bloodcurdling scream from the littlest and went running to their room from the kitchen. He was wailing, as his older brother was standing across the room, trying to look innocent.
At first glance, I couldn't see what was wrong. I picked him up, calmed him down and then took a really good look at him. That's when I saw the nasty red ring on his forearm. I certainly didn't need a forensics kit to know whose bite pattern it was. There were only two people around with teeth that small and the one who was crying has an unmistakable gap between his front teeth. It could only be his usually sweet and gentle big brother.
The first thing that ran through my mind were the words of my mother, "You only bit me once, I bit you back and you never did it again." Now I can honestly say that I don't remember this event and wear no scars, but I just couldn't bring myself to actually bite him for biting his brother. Maybe it works, but I couldn't see how he would make the association with my biting him and his biting his brother as being a punishment.
Instead, I explained to him that biting was wrong and that he had hurt his brother. I then sat him on the couch, with the TV for a few minutes to give him a little time out. After taking the time later to read the advice of the "experts," I found out that I had pretty much handled the scenario by the book. It is recommended that you:
- Learn your child's behaviors that might lead up to biting and head them off, when you can.
- Do not yell, hit or bite back. Simply explain to the child that biting hurts and that it isn't acceptable and remove them from the situation for a while.
- Pay plenty of attention to the injured child, to reinforce the point that he was hurt by what your child did.
- If your child bites again, be a bit more forceful and short with the answer, making it clear that he is being punished with a time out for hurting someone else.
We have been lucky and haven't had a repeat offense, as of yet. I'm sure with another one going through those trying toddler years, I haven't dealt with the last of the biting, though. Even still, I take comfort in knowing that this stage is just a part of growing up and with discipline, the behavior can be changed, even if it takes a little time.
Have you successfully survived the biting stage with your toddlers? What worked for you? Sound off at the Blissfully Domestic Forum.
(Photo Credit- Stephen Stills)
Shannan is a freelance writer who divides her time between wrangling unruly toddlers, homeschooling her middle schooler, building her writing business and attempting to create order from chaos. Read all about it at From Cribs To Car Keys.
Photo Credit: Tacitrequiem
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My 2.5 year old got bitten yesterday at school, on the abdomen. It's not pretty. Since the kid in question has been a scratcher and a biter for the first two weeks of school, he's out now. Maybe he's just overwhelmed, and feel badly for his parents, but I feel worse for my kid.:) I hope your little vampire's cured!