"But I don’t want to go to the doctooooooooooooor!"
Many children actually enjoy visits to their pediatrician or dentist, but there are plenty for whom this can be quite the anxiety producing experience. If your child is one of them, take a deep breath…you can help!
For younger children, start by asking your doctor if you can hold your little one on your lap for the exam; it generally is a better experience for all involved, doctor included!
It can also be very helpful for children to understand in advance what will happen at the appointment. If you aren’t sure yourself, call ahead and ask if there will be shots, or a dental X-ray, etc. The office staff should be more than happy to explain everything to you.
Once you’re informed, be honest with your children about what they can expect, but don’t focus too much on procedures. Explain briefly but thoroughly what will happen; the unknown can be very scary to children. Avoid phrases like, “Don’t be afraid, there’s nothing to be scared of, it will be alright.” We don’t use this type of language when we’re going to get ice cream…your kids will get that something is up.
Encourage your child to bring a comforting, familiar object. A young child might select a stuffed animal or blanket, while an older one might choose a favorite article of clothing or jewelry. It's amazing how much strength they can draw from something from home.
As always, keep those lines of communication open. For younger children, it can be helpful to do a bit of role playing, each take turns being, for example, the dentist. You might find that they have uncertainties about the visit that you’d never expect.
Don't bombard them with information too early, however. A child's sense of time is different than ours. For children five and
under I usually suggest telling them the day of or day before,
depending upon the time of the appointment. Older children need to have more time to mentally prepare.
Most importantly, do your best to qualm you own fears. Who amongst us likes needles? As parents we need to be careful not to exaggerate our children's anxiety by allowing them to feel our own. Again, it's important to be honest, but they will derive the most comfort from us if we aren't projecting our own anxieties onto them.
Have a question about healthy living for you and your family that you would love answered in one of Dr. Diva's columns or would you like to learn more about this one? Come on over to Blissfully Domestic Living and join the conversation!
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What if your child's fear of the doctor is based on the fear of shots? For a while my son didn't even want a birthday because he knew with a birthday came a trip to the doctor for some shots. He had a HORRIBLE reaction to shots last time. I had to help hold him down, he bolted for the door as soon as it was over. HORRIBLE for him, and perhaps even more horrible for me. He'll be five in June and I'm dreading the trip to get those shots before kindergarten!
PDX Mama,
I am actually planning on doing an article specifically about shots soon!