I read this commentary on Teen Checkup, and I thought, "thank goodness my child is still a baby." Really, God help me when it's time for me to make decisions such as whether or not my child will be allowed a cell phone. It is not boding well for him.
According to the commentator, young people, especially those in middle school, are engaging in a behavior called "sexting." Sexting occurs when kids (or anyone, for that matter) take naked pictures of themselves and then send the picture to others (who then forward the picture to an unimaginable number of people). Did your mouth just drop to the floor? Because mine did the first time I read about this.
As if the natural consequences of this behavior are not enough, sexting is actually child pornography. Under federal law, child pornography is a criminal act, and is defined as a visual depiction of any kind, including a drawing, cartoon, sculpture, painting, photograph, film, video, or computer-generated image or picture, where it depicts a minor engaging in sexually explicit conduct and is obscene.
The commentator concludes, "some people may argue that sexting is harmless and, perhaps, a form of safe sex. I would agree if 18-year-olds were doing it."
Excuse me, but even as an adult, I do not find sexting harmless. I find it disgusting, offensive, and troubling. And if any man text me a picture of himself in the buff, you better believe I would file a harassment charge.
If you have a teenager who has a cell phone, please talk with them. It is the parent's job to know what information and communication children are receiving from all media and digital outlets.
Let me know your thoughts on sexting and how you intend on working with your teen to prevent them from ever being involved in such behaviors.
Ali Hooper is a midwestern girl livin' in the 'burbs with her boys (hubby, baby, puppy). Once a School Counselor (now Editor of Homeschool Bliss), she whittles away her time blogging about the not-so-sunny side of motherhood at non-maternal instincts (though she loves showing off pictures of her adorable son at her family blog, The Hoopers).
Photo by McBeth
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My mum used to freak out enough when I ran a website with a blog & web cam (hi, yes, I was a 'camgirl') … and our computer was in the lounge room.. and the photos I posted were only ever of me smiling cutely into the camera… Even though I was only a young teen at the time I always knew ANYONE could see what I was going. And with phones, it's exactly the same as the internet, as soon as you put something out there… it's out of your hands and anyone can see it. If only all kids understood this. Sending your girl/boyfriend a naked photo is as good as posting it on perezhilton… It'll come out eventually … technology needs to be used wisely… It's scary to put technology into the hands of people who don't understand the consequences of misusing it..
I think this is a very scary thing. It's really disturbing. Do these kids not understand at all how harmful this could be for them?!
Well, mine didn't get phones until their late teens, but even then we had the phone company shut off all texting, no sending, no receiving. They will do it, you just have to ask.
This, unfortunately, has become a very real issue for my 11-year old daughter. A boy who had sent her a close-up picture of a male genitalia was constantly sending her text messages telling her that he wants to perform "a sexual act" with her. His words were far more disgusting, I can assure you. He was also sending messages asking her to meet him in a secluded area, alone, and "don't tell anybody". I had already addressed the issue of this boy constantly calling my daughter, who wanted nothing to do with him in this way. She politely, yes, politely, would tell him she was busy and please do not call her on her cell. It was finally, after seeing these obscene messages and the picture he sent, that I put a stop to it by speaking with his mother. She was understanding and handled the situation very well and responsibly. The problem, however, has been exacerbated by the fact that my daughter has been targeted as soliciting such behavior from this boy. The "boys will be boys" attitude has overshadowed the fact that my daughter is completely innocent of any wrong doing. How incredibly sad! I have read all the outgoing messages, as well as the incoming messages, on her phone. Her responses were clear to him that he was making her uncomfortable; one response even letting him know that he was scaring her. This situation has not yet been resolved completely and my daughter is receiving counseling for what is clearly harrassment. This boy's number, of course, has been blocked from her phone, as well as picture messaging. Now, I know that some people feel a child of her age should not have a text phone, but my daughter is involved in multiple sports, both at school and competitively outside of school. She has, at times, up to 25 hours a week of sports practice and activities. I need to be able to get ahold of her and she needs to be able to get in touch with me; it is that simple. I don't know in what forum this issue should be addressed, but help in educating kids and their parents is desperately needed.
Tina Harvey,
If a boy sent sexually explicit pictures to your underage daughter, he is guilty of distributing pornography to a minor. This is a serious crime. "Boy's will be boys" indeed. Typical response when the "boy" has committed a felony. You should look this up, (a google search for sexting will help) and perhaps speak with law enforcement. Behavior like this should not be tolerated under any circumstances.