If you are a special needs parent, you are most likely the member of at least one in-real-life support group and one virtual/online support group or forum for whatever disability your child suffers from.
These are amazing groups to be involved in because no one else on earth can understand what you are going through on a day-to-day basis. Friends are supportive and wonderful, but they do not live it.
These groups offer advice, support, ideas, opinions, education, and an ear for listening. They can keep you going, hold you accountable, help you get through the day, and simply make you realize that you are not the only one experiencing what you do each day.
However, if you have a child that is more severely affected by a disability, do you ever find that the accomplishments of other people's special needs children send you down in the dumps for a time? Are you able to get past that feeling and revel in their happiness along with them?
Conversely, if your child is less-afflicted, do you feel guilty about sharing his breakthroughs and triumphs with others whom you know may find it difficult to handle?
Special needs support is a difficult, if not dicey, road to navigate at times. Trying to connect with others without alienating them can be hard until you find those few people whom you know you can say anything to.
How do you navigate the waters of support groups? Cautiously? Without abandon? Let us know!
photo by Stephen Eastop
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I definitely tread lightly and try to share both the ups and downs. I also make a point of asking about and celebrating the triumphs of the other kids and their moms. I think it helps when moms know you truly care and aren't just there to make yourself feel better. If you're giving as much as you're receiving, everyone feels better.
That's a very good point, Kelly! Making sure that you balance things out – both up and down – is very good advice.
Thank you!
I defintitely celebrate all the triumphs of the children in my support group, but lately I've been having such a hard time with the 'downs'. I'm just at the beginning of the journey with my daughter and when I hear bad news about other children I cannot help but worry about the future and my own daughter's condition. I'm currently trying to find a balance between handling my own daughter's issues and be supportive to others.