It’s the most wonderful time of the year…
Only sometimes it’s not.
The week has been filled with hospitals and phone calls–a grandfather having surgery, another with pneumonia, a brother-in-law hit by a driver under the influence. My family went from crisis to crisis while Christmas carols played.
I just finished with a masters degree in counseling and worked with grief support groups. I heard over and over, “Christmas is HARD.” I’ve also received many responses to my book, Rain on Me: Devotions of Hope and Encouragement for Difficult Times, expressing similar emotions.
And so we’re left with this contrast between peace and pain, hope and heartache, set against the backdrop of tinsel and lights.
I’ve found we tend to respond one of two ways–ignore the troubles altogether or be overcome by them and lose the wonder of the season.
It seems we feel we have to make a choice between joy and tears. But the more I’ve pondered, the more I’ve realized that Christmas is about both.
After all, the manger led to the cross.
God’s heart must have felt much of what ours does in that moment–joy seeing His Son come as Savior of the world but also sorrow in knowing what that would mean one day on a hill called Calvary.
He knows what it’s like for us to have moments of bliss and others of brokenness. It’s okay for holidays to be happy and hard.
Because in all of those times we can come to Him…the One who came for us. He knows us fully and loves us deeply. He celebrates, comforts, calls us each by name.
More than ever, I believe this–all of this–is the real heart (and hope!) of Christmas.
Photo by John-Morgan
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This post was mentioned on Twitter by BlissfullyD: When the Holidays are Hard – http://clicky.me/4AU...
Kudo’s for you for living the truth of this post & sharing it, right smack dab at the beginning of the Christmas season.
“It seems we feel we have to make a choice between joy and tears. But the more I’ve pondered, the more I’ve realized that Christmas is about both.”
– my fave line. speaks to me. Thanks, Holley, for a breath of fresh air.
Holley – wow – great post! “After all, the manger led to the cross.” I’m totally there with you right now: one part overwhelmed, one part in awe, half exasperated and half exhilarated. I thank you for your honesty.
“He knows what it’s like for us to have moments of bliss and others of brokenness.”
What great comfort we can take from knowing that He knows all!
I have always been comforted by the knowledge that we cannot walk anywhere that He has not walked before us – or that He doesn’t promise to walk beside us. I have been much as you’ve described – trying to ignore the heartache and alternately being overwhelmed by it.
You have said it so beautifully, and I am encouraged. Thank you dear Holley. Praying for your family.
To be honest, when I read this blog I had to go deep in my mind to remember those days of “lonely holiday’s” or “dread of them because one more year went by without THE PROMSE”. But it didnt’ take a long time to recall that it really was hard. Hard to see other families doing the things I only longed for IF ONLY I HAD THE PROMISE too. Then all at once, THE PROMISE came to me without warning. IT was here, the baby we longed for was now in my arms. I kissed THE PROMISE and looked up to heaven and sang a song that is now ‘our song’……..”Shout to the Lord-to declare praises to My King”……my heart rejoices now as I look back at the hard times holidays brought: waiting, longing, aching for this promised child……..my heart had to hold on to HIS PROMISE for me, for only in HIM could I wait joyfully!
So true! Thank you, Holley.
“God’s heart must have felt much of what ours does in that moment–joy seeing His Son come as Savior of the world but also sorrow in knowing what that would mean one day on a hill called Calvary.”
Jenni Saake
http://www.HannahsHopeBook.com Seeking God’s Heart in the Midst of Infertility, Miscarriage & Adoption Loss
He does know what it’s like, no matter what we are going through. Thanks for a beautiful reminder!
Beautiful Post. Going to read this to my children.
I especially love this:
“God’s heart must have felt much of what ours does in that moment–joy seeing His Son come as Savior of the world but also sorrow in knowing what that would mean one day on a hill called Calvary.”
There was one year when a December 25 because the hardest day of my life: in court, guilty verdict, deportation from my beloved country. . . all on the day that was supposed to be CHRISTMAS. There was a quote that really spoke to me that year. It’s long, but I’m going to paste it in here:
It’s not at all surprising that Christmas is hard for you this year. The reason for Christmas is the same as it ever was, and nothing is more essential to our lives than the Incarnation. What’s different for you, I expect, is that the traditions we wrap around December 25 to make it different from other days, those traditions and activities are as nothing to you this year. In fact, the thought of them probably weighs like a lump of lead in your belly. So what! Trees are nothing. Feasts are nothing. Lights are nothing. Music is nothing.
Only Christ matters. He is the only reason that you can be on any sort of journey with God, that you can have anything at all to do with God. Only Jesus matters.
. . . One time I told someone in hard times, “Just hang in there.” But she corrected me, “I’m not just hanging in there. I’m trying to hang on to Jesus.”
So, please, just keep hanging on to Jesus.
Sometimes, when things are going well, we might too easily forget that we have only one sure, immovable, dependable strength—Jesus, who was a baby once and is always and forever God. That is what holds us and keeps us whether or not we can carry out our traditions. May our decorations, gifts, and festivities—or lack of them—never block our view of him but always point us toward him.
Treasuring God in Our Traditions by Noel Piper, page 88
Hi Holley,
Thanks for this post. SO TRUE. I’m sorry to hear about your grandfathers and brother in-law.
My dad suffered a massive stroke over Thanksgiving. It was very difficult. He is now in acute rehab and will be there until Dec. 16th. He will then move in with me and my husband in our 1 BR duplex, until he is self-sufficient.
We had to move him out of his home and rent a the duplex next door to us for him…so that he can move in there when he’s at least walking. We will have to continue to do everything for him and monitor him daily. We were not prepared for this. And have only been married for 3 months.
Meanwhile, my mom made some bad choices in life, including marrying an alcoholic after divorcing my dad, having a child with him (my now 5 yr old half brother, Tyler) and losing job after job b/c her husband can’t stay sober to watch Tyler during the day or support his family.
They are now struggling to survive and are about 5 min away from living out of their car. I get the desperate phone calls…but there is only so much I can do. My husband and I are limited on resources…(we would do anything for Tyler though).
Life can really throw some curveballs. But God only gives us what we can handle, right? We will get through it. Luckily, I married the greatest guy on earth…
Thanks for this post, and allowing me to get this off my chest.
Kelly
http://thepursuitofmommyness.com/
Hi Holley,
Thanks for the reminder! I lost my beloved Mom in July and this season is a flood of tears and memories as she was always at my home for Christmas. However I also find my self whistling carols and not even realizing it!? So it really is a mix but above all it is the wonder , joy and HOPE that the birth of baby Jesus brings to us all that keeps me on track.
Merry Christmas to you and yours!!!!
I never even thought of it this way. What a great post! It was truly eye opening.
Holly, beautiful post!
Thank you for sharing from the well HE has birthed in you.