Subscribe to our RSS Feed!

  • Channels

  • Family Bliss

    Not All Protein is Created Equal

    Tuesday, November 18th, 2008

    family Not All Protein is Created Equal

    Mealtime is the most stressful time of day for many families because it is a never ending battle of wills. You’ve probably got a decent grasp on the nutritional needs of your child, but there is no way to communicate the importance of protein, iron, and other vitamins to a screaming two year old who just wants to eat cheese quesadilla night after night with a side of milk - chocolate milk. This battle has moved to front and center in our household because of a recent discovery. While trying to grab a sneak peak at how my son will measure up on his first day of school next month, I realized that he is a full two inches shorter than my daughter was at the same age. Now I know that genetics is a wily trickster and may have programmed my daughter to be a 5′10″ strong woman while setting my son up to be a 5′5″ lean, mean, fighting machine, but really - two inches?

    The back story on this is that my son has a history of being anemic. When no medical reason was found for his low iron counts, it was determined that his diet was not actually meeting his nutritional needs. While my daughter lingered in the realm of baby foods eating iron fortified everything, my son, being the second child, sped quickly to the world of adult food. Only like most toddlers, his adult foods didn’t include leafy greens and tons of meat. My little guy received iron drops to supplement his diet, thus replacing his lost iron stores, and was graduated off of the drops and onto better meal planning from mom.

    Only I think mom has dropped the ball.

    In an attempt to track my son’s eating habits, I began to keep a daily food diary. I expected to be shocked and embarrassed at how few of his snacks and meals contained important vitamins and minerals. What I found was that he actually eats a wonderfully balanced diet filled with healthy whole grains, the occasional veggie, and TONS of fruit. And yes, he even eats the appropriate amount of protein. But the source of his protein is the cause for my concern. He almost exclusively derives his protein from dairy - yogurt, cheese, milk, with some peanut butter thrown in for good measure. Not only do dairy products contain very little iron, but some studies have shown that the calcium in dairy products may actually inhibit the body’s absorption of iron.

    I’ve now been given the task of walking that fine line that all parents must walk - how do I add vitamin and mineral rich foods to my child’s diet without replacing the goodness they are already receiving from the foods they love? The proteins that I have chosen for my son thus far may be taking up the room in his diet that needs to be filled with iron rich foods, but surely he needs the calcium that he is currently receiving from those foods?

    The trick is to be efficient in your food choices. Not only can you find iron rich foods that are an excellent source of protein, but they can be prepared and eaten in a way that maximizes the absorption of the iron. For example, don’t serve dairy with your meat. While calcium decreases the absorption of iron, ascorbic acid (vitamin C) actually increases the absorption of iron. Also, preparing foods in an iron pot or skillet actually transfers iron to that food and eventually to the person who eats the prepared food.

    Another trick is to maximize the small number of calories your child consumes by choosing those items that serve more than one purpose. For example, you already know that your children benefit from eating whole grains, but if you choose whole grain cereals that are fortified with iron (such as Cheerios, Total, and Raisin Bran) you are also increasing their iron intake. Also, vegetables and greens such as spinach and broccoli are not only high in iron, but they are also good sources of soluble fiber, calcium, and vitamins B9 and C.

    Finally, know where your child’s diet may be lacking - or not lacking - before you start to worry. Toddlers who are picky eaters and end up drinking large quantities of milk to satisfy their appetites are most likely to suffer from iron deficient anemia along with breastfed babies who are not also fed iron fortified cereals. Keep a daily food diary if you have concerns, and ask your pediatrician for a simple blood test to find out if your child needs a change in diet or a vitamin supplement.

    This is the route that I took when my tiny vegetarian gave me cause for concern. A finger prick and a banana flavored lollipop later we found at that he does not have anemia. All we have to do for his current iron levels is find a children’s multi-vitamin that contains iron. For a worried mom that already has enough on her plate, it’s a welcome relief to worry a little less about what’s on his.

    Share and Enjoy:
    • StumbleUpon
    • Kirtsy
    • TwitThis
    • Facebook
    • del.icio.us
    • Sphinn
    • Google
    • Reddit
    • Digg
    • LinkedIn

    Just Call Me Ticketmaster

    Monday, November 17th, 2008

    family Just Call Me Ticketmaster

    Editor’s Note- This post was something I wrote about over a year ago. My son is doing so much better and we are still using the ticket system in our house. I wanted to share this, in case other parents were going through something similar!

    I have been having parenting difficulties with my 5 year-old. He is an extremely sweet boy, but he is extremely strong-willed and he does not like going to school. This has been going on all year, but it has taken an extremely bad turn and he is becoming more physical (and more physically impossible) to battle with to make him go to school. Tuesday morning was the straw that broke the camel’s back, because our morning was the worst we had ever had together. I have even found myself having scary Mommy Dearest moments where I am yelling my head off at him and he is hitting me, screaming, and refusing to get in the car. I won’t go into all of the trauma, but I dreaded school mornings. He simply did not want to go to school and I did not know what to do. After a tearful talk with his teacher that day, I realized that something needed to change in our house.

    family Just Call Me TicketmasterKeep in mind that I tried everything that I could- getting him up earlier, eliminating distractions, and giving him warnings that it is nearing time to go, talking to him about what might be bothering him about school, frequent discussions with his teacher about behavior and what could be going on. You know, all the good stuff that the “experts” encourage. No matter what I did though, we were starting our mornings with tears and battles.

    I came home on Tuesday feeling defeated. Was it something I did that caused this? Why was I letting my temper get the best of me? Did I fail in disciplining him?

    I picked up a book that I got from the library about parenting strong-willed children entitled, “The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child.” I sat down and poured a cup of coffee and read, and read, and read. I got excited in that hour about all that I could do as a parent. I realized that I didn’t have to be a negative mom, I could be a positive parent. The family Just Call Me Ticketmasterbook was filled with tips on positive parenting and how to create positive solutions for your children. The main focus was on creating a point system for good behavior and focusing on positive praise to get positive results.

    Dr. Kazdin suggests implementing a chart in the home to award points to your child for the things you want them to do (in our case, go to school without a fight). His system reminded me of another system that one of our readers, Jodi, had shared about using raffle tickets and points for completing chores in our awesome chore discussion. Go back to that post and take a peek- her advice was right on par with the good doctor’s recommendations.

    I piled the kids in the car and forked over a few bucks for raffle tickets and pumped up the program to my son. It was recommended, in the book that I read, to throw in some theater or use your cheerleader voice (depending on what kind of person you were in high school, I guess)

    Me: Ethan, We are going to try something NEW!

    Ethan: (suspiciously) What kind of new thing?

    Me: We are going to get TICKETS for doing GREAT stuff and you can EARN AWESOME THINGS for going to school and doing your chores.

    Ethan: (still suspicious) What kind of things?

    Me: Oh, whatever kinds of things you like…games, movies, ice cream…

    Ethan: I like Wii games

    Me: Well, that might be something you could work towards, but um, those are a lot of money…But we can TRY! Rah Rah Sis Boom Bah! Gooooo Team!

    family Just Call Me TicketmasterThat is all it took to get him on board. We sat down and put together a list of activities that I wanted him to do around the house and a list of his rewards. We used a recycled coffee container for official ticket storage and worked all day the next day on putting together a fabulous chart of activities that he could do.

    Ethan’s chart is a picture chart, since he is not reading just yet. I pulled all of the images from Microsoft’s clip art collection. Ethan picked each of the pictures and we cut them out, mounted them on cardboard and wrote number values in the corners of each picture. I have to say, we were both pretty proud with the finished product.

    Ethan has one page of things he has to do to earn tickets and two pages of awesome rewards. We have them hanging on the refrigerator and he has been checking it and counting tickets like nuts for the past two days.

    Earn Tickets:

    Going to School Nicely- 3 tickets
    Make My Bed- 1 ticket
    Put breakfast dishes in the sink- 1 ticket
    Pick up toys before bed- 3 tickets
    Go to Bed Nicely- 1 ticket
    Feed the cat- 1 ticket
    Help Mommy With Laundry- 3 tickets

    family Just Call Me TicketmasterRewards:

    Get to Read an Extra Book- 5 tickets
    Go to the Library- 10 tickets
    Pick What to Eat for Dinner- 10 tickets
    Get a Movie- 10 tickets
    Play a Game With Mom or Dad- 10 tickets
    Rent a Video Game- 20 tickets
    1 Hour of Computer Time- 25 tickets
    Pick and Make a Snack With Mommy- 25 tickets
    Go to the Dollar Movie- 30 tickets
    Stay up 1 Hour Late- 35 tickets
    Get Ice Cream- 35 tickets
    Go Bowling- 100 tickets
    Wii or Leapster Game- 200 tickets
    Go to the Dinosaur Museum- 200 tickets

    In the book, they encourage you to not take away points, but tell your child that it is fine if they don’t want to do A, B, or C, but they will not get the points they need to get rewards. The book also reviews other forms of punishment, like time-outs and how to make them effective when disciplining your child. There is also an entire system of practicing what you need your child to do (basically acting out the parts of what you want to occur), praising your child for the pretend scenarios, then having them really do, and then rewarding them with points and praise that involve a hug, a high-five, or a pat on the back.

    If you are struggling with your child as I have been, you might want to check out the book! The Appendix of the book has a chart divided between age groups for activities that you could add to your charts and fun rewards that your child can earn.

    From one Mommy Dearest to another!

    Do you use charts in your house? How do you implement positive parenting in your house?

    Share and Enjoy:
    • StumbleUpon
    • Kirtsy
    • TwitThis
    • Facebook
    • del.icio.us
    • Sphinn
    • Google
    • Reddit
    • Digg
    • LinkedIn

    Homework Blues

    Monday, November 17th, 2008

    family Homework BluesSchool has started and I have a first grader! He seems to be loving it, but I’m having a hard time with him being gone so long. I miss him! Kindergarten was just right for me, why can’t they stay in kindergarten forever? As I quietly mourn the loss of my baby, I am also bracing myself for what can sometimes be a four-letter word in my house: homework.

    I have tried all I can think of to make homework enjoyable, or at least bearable. We have a cool tool box with colorful supplies, screen time rewards for getting the homework done, and a large dose of positivity and optimism. But he still drags his feet, whines, even cries when I pull out the homework. So I’m sending it out to my friends: have you figured out how to make homework fun, or at least not panic-inducing? HELP!

    Laura can be found blogging because it’s more fun than dishes at mommymenagerie!

    Share and Enjoy:
    • StumbleUpon
    • Kirtsy
    • TwitThis
    • Facebook
    • del.icio.us
    • Sphinn
    • Google
    • Reddit
    • Digg
    • LinkedIn

    They’re Playing Our Song

    Sunday, November 16th, 2008
    family-bliss Theyre Playing Our Song
    (Photo credit Valerie Everett)
    When we was pregnant with my first son, I wanted us to have a special song. I literally searched for months. He was born in North Carolina so I researched musicians from the Carolinas. I finally decided on James Taylor. After an appointment with the OB, my husband and I bought James Taylor’s greatest hits.
    On the drive home I listened closely to each song, wanting just the right one. When “You’ve Got a Friend” played I started crying. “Winter, spring, summer or fall, all you’ve got to do is call, and I’ll be there… you’ve got a friend.”
    I looked over at my husband, wanting to share this special moment with him and he said, “This is the best nacho-bell-grande I’ve ever had!” (We had stopped at Taco Bell before heading home.)
    Not the response I was hoping for, but it did make the moment even more memorable.
    So from that day on, every morning I played and sang “You’ve Got a Friend” to my growing belly. I was hoping that when our baby was born, he would remember the song and respond to it.
    On October 25th he was born. We brought him home, got in a routine, and I started playing and singing “You’ve Got a Friend” every day to him.
    Some time around the 8th month he did respond to music. But it wasn’t “You’ve Got a Friend.”
    Every time the theme song for the TV show “Gilmore Girls” came on he would turn and smile. All that hard work getting “You’ve Got a Friend” in his head, and he responded to the Gilmore Girls’ theme. Since I watched re-runs of the show everyday, it made sense that he would be familiar with the song.
    family-bliss Theyre Playing Our Song
    Often we work really hard to teach our children something- numbers, riding a bike, manners, or driving a car. But it’s what they learn just from observation and imitation that always surprises us.
    Sandra’s new favorite show is the Imagination Movers!  She blogs at Today’s Housewife.
    Share and Enjoy:
    • StumbleUpon
    • Kirtsy
    • TwitThis
    • Facebook
    • del.icio.us
    • Sphinn
    • Google
    • Reddit
    • Digg
    • LinkedIn

    Celebrate Family Achievements

    Saturday, November 15th, 2008

    family Celebrate Family Achievements

    photo by nookiez

    Since we’ve been married, my husband and I have set goals for ourselves.  Some have been small, like creating a budget.  Others have been bigger, like paying off our vehicles.  For motivation, we always accompany each goal with a potential reward.

    As I am writing this, we are preparing to celebrate a new achievement.  We have created a savings account that contains one month’s living expenses.  With the economy in such a terrible state, we wanted to be prepared if my husband were to lose his job.  Hopefully, that will not happen, but if it does, we can rest assured that we’ll still be able to pay our bills and buy necessities for at least another month while he searches for another job.

    We’re celebrating today by going out for dinner and dessert at a nice restaurant - something we rarely do!

    Any motivational resource will tell you its important to reward yourself when you reach a goal because:

    • It just feels good
    • It will continue to motivate you
    • It proves you have made progress
    • It reminds you that hard work pays off
    • It celebrates the achievement of a goal

    Rewards for special accomplishments can be simple, like a pizza and a movie, or if its a big achievement, go all out and treat the family to a special summer vacation!  You don’t even have to spend money, just make it something your family will appreciate.

    When our daughter is older, we hope to instill in her a motivation to achieve her goals, and help our family achieve our goals by celebrating each accomplishment along the way.

    Rachel is a freelance writer and loves to motivate herself with chocolate.  Visit her blog, Modern Mommyhood for more frugal ideas for your family.

    Resource: KGC Enterprise: The source for motivation information and news

    Share and Enjoy:
    • StumbleUpon
    • Kirtsy
    • TwitThis
    • Facebook
    • del.icio.us
    • Sphinn
    • Google
    • Reddit
    • Digg
    • LinkedIn