According to a recent survey and article from Parade magazine, 48% of men don’t have sex more often because their spouse isn’t interested. Yet 51% of women responders say they aren’t having enough sex! I’m guessing that the “48% of men” aren’t married to the other “51% of women”!

Whether you fall in with the “non interested” or the “not enough”, I’m reminded of what The Diaper Diaries said last year when she started her 1 Corinthians 7:5 Challenge aka “The Challenge”:

A lot of women post-kids complain about losing interest in sex. … Ladies, God gave us sex as a gift to enjoy with our husbands. Don’t believe me? How about a quick anatomy lesson? Women have something even men don’t when it comes to sex. An organ devoted entirely to sexual pleasure (if I lost you, it rhymes with Delores). So why aren’t we enjoying it more?

I strongly encourage you to read through “The Challenge” at The Diaper Diaries, it’s just what the “non interested” and “not enough” among us need to kick start a new era of loving in our marriages!

But don’t stop there! Alisa Bowman at Project Happily Ever After has some interesting suggestions for all of us:

• Lie on top of the sheets naked. Depending on the time of year and your level of privacy, open the window so you can feel a breeze on your skin. Close your eyes and relax (Don’t do the closing your eyes part, however, if you are so sleep deprived that you’ll end up falling asleep).
• Spice it up. Part of the turn-off of long-term monogamy stems from monotony-doing the same old sexual routine every single time. He kisses you here. Then you touch him there. Point A goes into slot B. Oh, so been there, done that. Try new locations. For instance, try out all of the rooms of your house. Then move to the backyard. Try new positions. Try new outfits.

There’s more at Project Happily Ever After, be sure to check out the rest of her list!

Now that you’ve got all this stimulating information, go on and make sure that your husband doesn’t fall in the 48% of men or you don’t fall in the 51% of women!

Malia is the Wedded Bliss editor and co-authors the blog, live. laugh. love., with her husband, DB.

Photo Credit: borax

Well Extraordinary Wives, which group do you identify with? Would you be willing to try any of the suggestions offered by these smart and creative Extraordinary Wives? We can dish about it at The League!

Due to the sensitive nature of this subject, comments are closed on this post. Discussions will be held at The League of Extraordinary Wives. For an invitation to The League, please e-mail us at wedblissfully@gmail.com.

The grass is always greener on the other side, I have heard it said. Anyone who has been married past the honeymoon stage knows that so many of us in marriage fall for lies that are as old as the Garden of Eden.

We live in a society of “what have you done for me lately.” Wives wonder why their husband is not as romantic as other husbands or husbands wonder why their wife does not respect them like other wives respect their husbands.  This line of thinking leads to believing false promises made by Satan.

One study from the University of Washington conducted this year said:

About 20% of men and 15% of women under 35 say they have been unfaithful. That is up from about 15% and 12% respectively.

We can speculate why all day, but I suggest the reason why is as old as the Garden of Eden. Satan plays his same tricks to attack and demolish the commitment of marriage.

Satan tells us we can have it all: knowledge, fulfillment, power and feelings of worthiness by being unfaithful. And don’t worry about those pesky little consequences, God was only joking.

We all go through periods in our marriage where things feel stale and we become out of sync, it is during these times Satan is constantly telling us the “grass is greener.” This is a lie; rekindle your relationship by revisiting what made you fall in love in the first place. Share memories of your dating relationship, remember past memories, and spend time together. Do not allow Satan in during the difficult times in your marriage.

Dr. Dobson said this about marriage, “Water the plant, place it in the sunlight, and it will grow. If you put it in a cold dark corner, however, it is likely to die.” Don’t let your marriage die, fight for it!!

Extraordinary Wives, is there a time you have had to fight for your marriage even when your feelings were failing you? Let’s talk this out at The League!

Not a member of The League of Extraordinary Wives? E-mail us at wedblissfully@gmail.com for an invitation.

Laurel is the author of the blog Laurel’s Reflections. Laurel and her husband of 15 years are currently raising two teenage sons and one elementary son.

Photo credit: by law_keven

We are all individuals. We have our own preferences, idiosyncrasies and baggage. When we marry we bring along a lifetime of experience, behavioral patterns and beliefs. These personal differences never magically go away. The good news is that our differences do not have to be erased for our marriages to be happy.

In reality most marital conflicts never completely get resolved. We all have in-law issues, different child-rearing ideas, and of course the never ending toilet paper roll debate. For the record, I like the roll on the holder with the sheet on top, ready to pull down. I do not like the roll on the floor, on the back of the toilet, or empty. And, no, it will never be resolved in my house.

Here is the reality, the toilet roll placement does not matter. I could get angry everyday and nag and complain. Remember to save complaints for the biggies, right? Even if I did explain why civilized people don’t leave rolls scattered around the bathroom he would not wake up one day and say, “I better put the T.P. roll how she likes it.”

The truth is that none of us has a monopoly on the truth every time. The important thing is that we let the little things go and compromise on the big issues. It is healthy and good to express our opinions to each other, but if you can’t change your spouse’s mind you can’t be a jerk about it.

Disagreements must be handled without blaming, personal attacks and bringing up how he forgot your anniversary two years ago. The key is to try to put yourself in his shoes and understand his viewpoint. You don’t have to agree, just agree to disagree. You’ll win some and lose some.

Conflict is normal and not in it’s self a problem in your marriage. Even the happiest couples have it! What is important is how you manage it. Marriage is a long term give and take. Sometimes the roll makes it on the holder and the paper is facing the correct way, and sometimes not!

Extraordinary Wives continue here.

Not a member of The League of Extraordinary Wives?  E-mail us at wedblissfully@gmail.com to ask for an invitation.

{Originally published by Mrs. Fussypants on April 14, 2008}

Does this guy make you swoon?

photo from web

What about this guy? Do your knees go weak?

photo from People.com

Will your heart start fluttering if you encounter this guy?

Photo from Versace ad

You may think me most peculiar but…those guys above? They do nothing for me. I can appreciate their beauty. I can look at them and acknowledge that yes, they are good looking men. But no one makes my heart race or my knees go weak like my husband does.

Turns out, research backs me up on this. A study from eHarmony and UCLA researchers shows that when we are in love, we look at members of the opposite sex as less attractive. Our love for our partners enables us to resist temptation.

“Feeling love for your romantic partner appears to make everybody else less attractive, and the emotion appears to work in very specific ways by in enabling you to push thoughts of that tempting other out of your mind,” said Gian Gonzaga, an eHarmony research scientist and lead author of the study, which appears in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior.

I can’t look at another man and feel “turned on” or “excited” by their appearance. How could I? I don’t love them and I know very little about their personalities.

• I don’t know if I can count on them to get up with a sick child in the middle of the night.
• I don’t know if they’ll kiss me in the mornings after I’ve had coffee and they are an adamant coffee hater.
• I have no idea if they’ll willingly offer me the last bite of a shared dessert.
• I can’t know if they would be OK with me getting mascara on their favorite t-shirt as I sob my eyes out on their shoulder.

But I do know those things about my husband and much, much more. He’ll always be the one I long for and the only one that can make my knees go weak with a simple wink and his dimpled smile.

Malia is the Wedded Bliss editor and co-authors the blog, live. laugh. love., with her husband, DB.

 Let’s take this to The League of Extraordinary Wives! Have you experienced this phenomenon in your marriage?

Not a member of The League of Extraordinary Wives? E-mail us at wedblissfully@gmail.com for an invitation.

{Information for this article came from the article, Did You Know How Beautiful You Are?, orginally posted by Mrs. Fussypants on May 31, 2008}

I know we’re in full fall mode here at Blissfully Domestic, but I think I have a reason for you to cling to a last vestige of summer. According to an article appearing on Science Daily, watermelon “may have a Viagra-like effect to the body’s blood vessels may even increase libido“.

Scientists know that when watermelon is consumed, citrulline is converted to arginine through certain enzymes. Arginine is an amino acid that works wonders on the heart and circulation system and maintains a good immune system, Patil said.

“The citrulline-arginine relationship helps heart health, the immune system and may prove to be very helpful for those who suffer from obesity and type 2 diabetes,” said Patil. “Arginine boosts nitric oxide, which relaxes blood vessels, the same basic effect that Viagra has, to treat erectile dysfunction and maybe even prevent it.”

“Watermelon may not be as organ specific as Viagra,” Patil said, “but it’s a great way to relax blood vessels without any drug side-effects.”

It seems that watermelon is quickly becoming the new wonder fruit! So while apples and pears and pomegranates may be all the rage this time of year, don’t give watermelon the snub just yet. Snatch up that last bit of watermelon from your grocer’s bins or cold storage shelves and give summer a proper send off! If you know what I mean!

Viva la Watermelon!

So, Extraordinary Wives…how about we discuss this more at The League?

Not a member of The League of Extraordinary Wives? E-mail us at wedblissfully@gmail.com for an invitation!

Malia is the Wedded Bliss editor and co-authors the blog, live. laugh. love., with her husband, DB.