So, how was it for you?  Valentine’s Day, that is.  As Malia wrote last week, there are several different camps on this “holiday,” with some of us eagerly anticipating truffles and trinkets and others loathing the randomness of it all.

I find myself somewhere in the middle.  Here are a few things I like to spend my hard-earned money on:  Travel.  Good books.  Dinner at fun restaurants.  In the not-so-fond-of-blowing-my-money-on-this-stuff category: Jewelry. $5 singing cards.  Stuff that fills my house that I don’t need.

That said, I wouldn’t turn away a box of fine truffles or a few pretty flowers on any day of the year.

This year, I told my husband that all I wanted was his love.  “Good thing,” he laughed, “because that’s all I got you.

Now before you get all defensive on my behalf, I didn’t get him anything either.  And this non-exchange of gifts is totally fine with me.  We’ll be doing a little of the aforementioned travel shortly, and I would much rather spend money there, doing something fun together, than watch some roses from Costco die on my counter over the next week.

But here’s the thing:  This notion works because we agree on it.  If I were a game-player, if I were one of those women who said I didn’t really want a gift but was really secretly hoping for one, then this day blows up in my face.  I’d be sad.  I’d question our relationship.  I’d long for a romantic flower-giving partner.

So be honest with your man, ladies.  Do you want to celebrate your love with gifts on Valentine’s Day?  That’s fine.  Say so!  Would you rather spring for a bottle of fine wine and spend an evening in deep conversation by the fire?  Let him know.  It’s not how you feel about the day that matters; it’s what you do with those feelings.

Here’s to an honest Valentine’s Day for all of us next year.