So, did you do it? Where you able to complete the Wedded Bliss 7 Day Sex Challenge? I have to confess, I failed my own challenge! But all was not lost because I did learn a few things.

First, you must be intentional. – I don’t know why I thought that having sex every day for a week was going to be a breeze. I just figured it would all happen, um, naturally. But when it got to be 11:30 on Monday night, I could barely keep my eyes open and no – there had not been any marital relations yet that day, that was my first clue that I was going to need to lend “nature” a hand. Which led to the next realization.

Second, you must communicate your intentions. – My husband knew about the challenge but I never actually said, “I want to see if we can have sex every day for a week.” And it’s not that he wasn’t on board with the challenge, it was that I didn’t make it an important part of each day. Like I said, I just thought nature would take it’s course.

Third, it’s OK to fail. – I laid a pretty heavy guilt trip on myself about halfway through the week when I realized that there was no way we could even salvage this challenge. But then I realized that I had learned some things about myself and about our marriage. As much as we enjoy that part of our relationship, seven days in a row just isn’t going to work out for us. We shouldn’t force an unrealistic expectation on ourselves, it only leads to disappointment and misery. Yes, sex is a very important part of marriage but each couple needs to find their own rhythm, so to speak, regarding everything from frequency to time of day.

I sincerely hope that those of you who took the challenge not only enjoyed yourselves but reconnected with your husband on not only a physical but an emotional level as well. And I also hope that you, too, learned something more about the nature of well, nature!

Malia is the Wedded Bliss editor and co-authors the blog, live. laugh. love., with her husband, DB.

Photo credit: stock.xchng

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