For some marriages, money is the hardest subject to bring up and not argue about. When it comes to finances there are so many hot spots in marriage that pretty much the entire subject is taboo. Who should work, who will be in charge of paying the bills, how much to save, what type of investments should you use, what exactly constitutes an investment…? The list can go on and on. How can we cope with this beast called finances and not untie the knot of marital bliss?

1. Leave your emotions at the door. If you walk into a conversation with your defenses up then it’s bound to end up a messy situation. Try not to take offense when your spouse says you’re not good with money. The same goes for you, if you are the money savvy one don’t belittle your partner for being not like you.
2. Be realistic. If you know that you can’t resist a sale maybe you shouldn’t be in charge of the finances. Despite what some of your girlfriends may say, it’s okay not to be in charge of the bank account. Just be sure you still have access to all the information. Not being in charge doesn’t mean you should be clueless.
3. Honesty. Whoo wee, yes I said it! You can’t have a healthy relationship with the love of your life and hide packages under the guest bed. Nope not behind the vacuum either—even though I could hang a brand new mink coat on top of the vacuum and my husband would never see it…. Finding a notice on the door is not the best way for your spouse to find out you’re 5 months behind on your mortgage.
4. Set common goals and stick to them. If you want to buy a house in two years then break down on a monthly or even a weekly basis how much you will have to put aside. Then do it.
5. Give it up, turn it lose – your addiction to Starbucks that is. It could be any guilty pleasure like fast food everyday for lunch or eating out 4 nights a week for dinner that could be causing that financial strain on your wallet. If you both give up equally important decadent items the other party won’t feel as resentful.

See, this list really could go on and on. The subject of money can be touchy in even the best relationship but it’s important enough to stay on top of for the sake of your happy home.

Photo Credit: stock.xchng

{Originally published November 20, 2008}