1.    Give It Time – The first few weeks, even months, of deployment are hard. Don’t begrudge yourself the time to get used to the new system of being alone.

2.    Get Prepared – If there is something you and your spouse need to take care of together, get it done before deployment! It will alleviate stress on your part when he is gone.

3.    Get Involved – The best thing you can do when your spouse is deployed is to get connected with women who understand everything you are going through! If you are shy and don’t have an established group of friends familiar with the military yet, hop online and find a military wives’ message board! Or look into some blogs written by women whose husbands are in the military. These can be excellent sources of encouragement for you.

4.    Settle Into A Routine – Speaking from experience I know when you are used to having a loved one available to you 24/7 and then have to deal with not having that access; it can be a challenge to establish a new routine. Tough this one out and make the new routine. A few months down the road you will be happy you did.

5.    Keep A Journal – My husband’s last deployment was for 9 months. During that time I kept a journal of letters to him. If I wanted to talk to him and wasn’t able to, I would write a letter instead. You will be surprised how therapeutic this is! It almost feels like you are talking to him once you get into it.

6.    Try To Be Strong – This goes especially for when you ARE talking or emailing with your spouse. I know it is hard not to cry and tell your Man how much you want him home but remember he wants to come home too.  On top of that, he is also dealing with the daily stress of his job requirement. Try to keep the little time you do communicate happy. That will fill you up for a longer time then crying the whole time!

7.    Keep A Memento – Right before my husband was to go on an extended training exercise he wrote me the sweetest letter and sent it to me as a surprise. I read it constantly, just as a reminder of our love. You should see the thing! It is as worn out as can be but I still have and treasure it.

8.    Lean On Family & Friends – On the days you simply feel overwhelmed and depressed, call a friend and tell them all about it! Sometimes just getting it off of your chest makes you feel all the more better.

9.    Stay Connected – Another thing my husband and I have done is to read the same books while he was on deployment. We called it our “date night” and would both try to read the same book, on the same day. It sounds silly but it really made us feel more connected. Then when we would talk we could discuss the book with each other and already felt more in sync. This is one of my favorites!
10.    Take It One Day At A Time – Some days will be better than others, and do you know what? That’s okay.

Kristen, a Navy wife, is the editor of Exemplify Online and writes daily at her blog {dancing} in the margins. She is addicted to penguin shaped post-it notes, adores a great scarf, is always on the hunt for a new pair of heels and believes iMacs make the world a better place.