When the kids come home from school the first thing I ask them is how their day was. Sometimes I can gauge how the day was simply by the look on their face and sometimes it takes some prying. When I ask it’s not because it’s a knee-jerk reaction or something I feel as a parent I should ask, it’s because I really, really want to know.

Many times we ask kids those questions, not in the hopes of really wanting to know but because we feel we should or it was something our parents asked us. Either way, when you ask out of obligation, you set your kids up for a huge disservice as their advocate in school.

I’ve actively been a participant in my kids’ schools not just a volunteering capacity but in their academics as well and through that time I’ve learned a few things that unfortunately some parents just don’t seem to get;

When it comes to school, no one will care more about what your kid gets out of it than you.

You might argue and say, “But the teacher cares. That is their job; to teach my child.” You’re right it IS their job but it is also to make sure the job is getting done. That doesn’t mean that you are to grade the school or the administration at every little turn but as a parent there are some things you can and should be doing.

•    BE ACTIVE – Check over the papers that come home. If your school has a website where you can see your child’s progress then check it weekly to make sure they are really turning in the homework or to see what projects they might be working on.

•    COMMUNICATE – With your child and the school. Don’t wait for something to go wrong or a problem to arise. Send the teacher an email and introduce yourself if they haven’t already met you. Talk to your child about what they think of the teacher, how they are getting along with classmates and what subjects are getting them down. Ask them about Art and Gym or if they found any good books in the library.

Lastly, and this is a big one so pay attention because many parents don’t do this:

•    DON’T BE AFRAID TO BUCK THE SYSTEM – You heard me. If you think or know something is going on that isn’t right or is a disservice to your child’s education, speak up about it. That is your job; to make sure your child is getting the best education they can get.  I’ve sat through Parent teacher conferences and meetings where I’ve flat out told teachers that their way wasn’t working and it was time to try things MY WAY.

On more than one occasion, I have been known to question a teacher’s decision when it came to what I felt was best for my child. I’m not an advocate against schools; but I am an advocate for my children’s education. I believe we have to do whatever it takes to make sure they get the kind of education they deserve.  Sometimes that means going against popular opinion.

We are a new generation of parents and unlike some of our parents we aren’t and shouldn’t be afraid to question what schools tell us is right for our kids. Teachers and school administrations are made up of humans and humans make mistakes.

How have you become an advocate for your child in the educational system? Visit our forum for a frank discussion!

You can read more from Nichole at The Guilty Parent and Chaos in the Country where she talks about writing, parenting and everything in between.