By melbs1969 | Leave A Comment
Very early on in our marriage, while my husband was still at work, I took the four kids out for ice cream. An after school treat. They were so little then. So cute…from preschool through first grade. All of them looking like they could, very possibly, be related…with light hair and light eyes!
They were sitting so sweetly on a bench. Busily licking their quickly melting ice cream cones, chatting amongst themselves and having a great time and BEHAVING so nicely!!
An older patron glanced at my children in admiration. Then, she looked at me and smiled.
“Are they all yours?” She asked. Which wasn’t the first time, or the last, that question had been asked to me, in the very same tone.
“Well kinda.” I replied, which was my standard response…until I wised up. Because, inevitably, the response would lead to a raised eyebrow, which would inevitably lead to me going into a soliloquy that went something like… well… IhavetwoandmyhusbandhastwothatI’mraisingsothereforetheyareALLmine… deep breath, smile, turn, walk away.
Well on this particular day. With this particular woman. She didn’t allow it to end at my smiling and walking away.
NO.
She looked at me with great respect and said, “No one would ever know that they weren’t all yours. Not with the way they look at you. Or they respond to you. And the way they hang out with each other. You’re doing a good job!”
Then, she touched my arm, said good bye and good luck and went off to order her ice cream.
That moment stayed with me. Because, as abnormal as I felt back then, with two kids calling me Mommy and two kids calling me Melissa I realized that, no matter how anyone looked at us, no matter who was calling me what…
We were just a Mommy and her four kids, enjoying an ice cream during a warm, early fall day.
And life…
was pretty darn sweet.
ABOUT melbs1969
{read more}
Loading ...
This is a lovely post. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for this “sweet” post! It made my day! It goes to show you that a kind word stays with people a very long time, so let’s give kind words whenever and wherever we can.
You are doing a good job, if no one can tell which ones are yours, and which ones are yours by marriage.
Bravo !
excellent, my dear. as a stepmom, i too aim for “yes, they’re all mine” …
Wow… that was really well said.
I am 3 months into a “blended” relationship. I have six children, and he has one. It has been tougher in my head than I ever thought it would be.
This is a step, it’s a thought I had not considered, Thank you, and Thank the stars for that woman to come along and show you what an amazing mother you are.
wonderful and beautiful… and with all the hard work and sometimes painful hurts, you know what it is all about.
The best, and congrats, hope you write here often, they would be very lucky to have you.
Joanie
Oh my…never under estimate the power of an encouraging word.
I get the “all they all yours?” all the time. Yes, They are, and yes, I know what causes that.
Too sweet girl, I was always amazed when people would
ask me if my one was mine….? Talk about feeling like
a mom from another planet..
Love that! It’s those moments you realize that most people are actually good people, not the dangerous mob we worry about our kids growing up around.
It’s still been hard for me to say “Yes” when I get this question about my two teenage stepsons, the older of which is only 11 years younger than I. If I say yes, it’s clearly not literal, so I feel awkward in doing so.
We are all getting closer and settling in, but I don’t yet have that selflessness that comes with being a bioparent.
Thanks for this post.