By Kat | Leave A Comment
The Diva is back! I am in full swing and ready to save the day - or at least pretend to! I recently received this question from a loyal reader:
How do you address the issue of allowance? My biological children do not get an allowance. My step children think they deserve an allowance but they do nothing to help out around the house when they are here. I grew up with each family member having choirs because “a family works together to keep a house running”. How do I address this if my own children aren’t getting an allowance? Sincerely – Empty Wallet
Well Empty, that is quite a question. When it comes to allowance, I’ve found there are generally two schools of thought:
1) Allowance is tied to chores, and if chores are completed allowance is rewarded
2) Allowance is NOT tied to chores. That chores are an expected part of being a part of a family, and allowance is something totally unrelated.
This Diva’s philosophy is the second. I believe that every member of the household should contribute in an age appropriate fashion because THAT IS WHAT FAMILIES DO. I believe that a three year old can carry her dinner dishes to a sink and a six year old can help fold clothes. Allowance, to me, is more of a way to start teaching my children the fundamentals of money management: saving for something you want, when it’s gone it’s gone, and the feeling of a crisp dollar bill in your pocket. (Using my philosophy, there ARE definitely consequences for not participating in the chore portion – but it’s not a money thing).
Having said that, there’s nothing wrong with the first philosophy and many families use that successfully. It’s probably helpful to teach children that you “earn your paycheck” and that rarely in this life do you get something for nothing.
Whatever philosophy you and your hubby subscribe to, it’s important to be on the same page. It’s also important to keep the children’s expectations of how much they should be given in the realistic range. No need to empty your wallets – allowance shouldn’t break the bank!
LOVE - A DIVA
You can catch up with Kat and the chaos that is boys over at the Sassy Irish Lassie!
ABOUT Kat
A funky and sassy girl with a lot of spunk. Tend to be devilish in nature (so they tell me) and an a{read more}
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I would suggest since you only have your step children there sometimes setting up a way to earn allowance. They can do chores and get paid or they cannot. You don’t have to offer a lot per chore. Let them know some chores are expected but they dan do extra chores and earn allowance.
I like Cassie’s idea – like a tiered chore structure perhaps? There’s the expected level of chores and then they can step it up for money… Hmmm. Interesting!!
Money is such a tough one, isn’t it?! We struggled with this & came down on #2 as well–our kids do chores because that’s what we all do. However, when they get older (5th grade), they do get a “salary,” which comes along with fiscal responsibilities, like paying for birthday gifts when they get invited to a party. I hesitate to link to my own post, but I wrote about this last fall, and if you’re struggling to figure this out, maybe it will help: http://tinyurl.com/c9euaf. Good luck!