When my sister was in cosmetology school she needed a volunteer upon which she could sharpen her haircutting skills (pun intended) and receive a grade. I wanted to be a supportive older sister, I wanted to show her I had faith in her newly-learned skills. I put myself at the mercy of my sister and her scissors and walked out of that beauty school with an amazing haircut.

When I was next ready to have my hair trimmed I didn’t hesitate to turn to my sister again. She did such an excellent job the first time. I didn’t have a single negative thought about turning my noggin over to her. And yet… two days before my thirtieth birthday (and one day before the surprise party my husband had planned with all my family and friends), I found myself with some severely short hair. Whoops.

On my actual birthday, I found myself in tears in a salon having a stylist discretely repair the damage — straightening up the ends, fixing the layers, making it liveable until it grew out. And I never told my sister what I’d done (don’t worry, she doesn’t read my blog!).

It’s a tricky line to walk – I never wanted my sister to start questioning herself or her abilities (especially when she was still in the learning stages). I didn’t want to shake her confidence or hurt her feelings. I wanted her to be able to realize gently that she’d made mistakes and that they weren’t the end of the world, and that hair is just hair. It grows back (even though it can be slightly traumatizing if you let it – I’ve tried to let go of that part of my personality!).

I remind myself of this often – when my daughters are working on new stunts in gymnastics, when my youngest is working on shaping and recognizing her letters, when my husband is trying to improve his mile time, and even when I’m struggling with a new song in guitar lessons: Sometimes new skills require time. Sometimes things don’t come easily to us. Sometimes it takes a little more practic and a little more effort on our part, and the support and cheerleading from our family and friends can make the whole process a little easier.

Photo source:  Photos by Lina