I once had a wise friend tell me that the biggest skill we can teach our children is resilience — the ability to roll with the punches. Though my older child is only 9, I have seen the truth of this in many ways over the past few years.

We’ve been very careful and slow about how we’ve worked her stepfather into the family. He’s not involved in her discipline much, if any. He views his role as another caring adult, and we’ve been deliberate about giving her time to adjust.

So when I realized this week I’d be at an all-day meeting on a day my daughter would normally spend with us, I talked to her dad and stepmother. I said, “You know, if your schedule allows, I don’t mind if she stays with you or if we switch days, if she’s not comfortable spending the day with her stepfather yet.” (It hasn’t been a year since we married.)

I expected her to choose another option, but I was delighted when they reported back — she preferred to keep the regular schedule, even though I wouldn’t be here for most of the day. When I did get home, everyone had had a good day — nothing out of the ordinary to report.

A boring day was the best sign in a long time that we’re doing something right.

How do you help your kids handle transitions and new situations?

Laura Creekmore is mom to the 9yo, the 3yo and the player to be named by mid-May. She and her husband live in Nashville, TN, where she blogs about cooking and random things that strike her fancy at Fixin’ Supper. She’s a web strategist by trade and runs her own company, Creekmore Consulting.