By SarahB | Leave A Comment
My mom just friended my dad’s wife on Facebook. I can’t help but find that a smidge odd, but then again, part of me is relieved for the civility. They talk on the phone, they email and now Facebook. It boggles my mind.
My brother and I are way past 18, so you would think that the need for there to be communication between my long-divorced parents would be somewhere between slim and none. My brother, at 34 years old, has special needs and chronic health concerns which necessitate some coordination (even now) between my parents. My dad’s wife (she hates the “step-” prefix on anything) is the more organized than my father so she handles many of the details relating to my brother. In turn, she and my mom coordinate most things together.
Are they best buds? No. Would they talk if they didn’t have to? Probably not. But that they can work together is a good thing.
Most stepparenting literature I’ve seen suggests that the two biological parents be left to work together, leaving the stepparent(s) out of what could be a crazy equation. Though I am civil with my stepson’s mother, I think we both prefer if she works with my husband.
Which method works best for your family?
Photo credit: Jacob Botter on Flickr
ABOUT SarahB
Sarah is a wife, and a mother to two daughters, aged 8 and 5. She's is the stepmother to a 14-year-{read more}
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For context: My parents divorced when I was 3 and my brother was 1. I am now 36. My dad died about 10 years ago. My mom and stepmom have always been civil as far as I could tell. We didn’t all get together much and it was never that bad when we did… weddings, graduations, and the occasional holiday. My half-brother (with dad and stepmom) is getting married this fall and inviting my mom.
On the flip side, my step-dad’s ex hasn’t spoken to my mom in the 20 years that they’ve been married. All kinds of interactions are terribly awkward for their children. It sucks.