The other day at the grocery store, a man of a different ethnicity reached across us to get something out of the freezer.  My son chose that particular moment to declare (loudly), “Mom! Something smells like poo-poo!”

The next day my daughter observed a woman with an extremely large shirt and rather short shorts passing us on the sidewalk.  Slightly less loudly, she turned to me and announced, “I almost thought that lady didn’t have any shorts on!”

While I am not an expert in terms of scholarship, I have learned a few things from my experience with many, many such embarrassing moments.  These are a few things I try to keep in mind when such comments trip lightly from my children’s mouths.

1) Downplay the statement. If you draw attention to it, the object of the comments might pick up on the observation instead of disregarding it as referring to someone else.  When my son brought up the odor, I asked him if he had passed gas or had a poopy bottom himself.  I treated his comment as something going on within our own family, rather than a reference to anyone else.  Also, if I had displayed my own embarrassment, my son may have capitalized on his power in other situations.

2) Treat the statement as matter-of-factly as possible. When my daughter observed the potential “missing” shorts, I simply replied, “but she is wearing shorts.”  I couldn’t change the context of the observation in this instance but I hoped that if the lady heard her say it, she would also know that we actually could see her shorts and were no longer experiencing any question about said shorts.

3)  Take time in private to talk about what makes an observation appropriate and inappropriate. This doesn’t mean your child will never make another inappropriate observation but if you have enough conversations about this, hopefully by the time your children are adults, they will have learned at least a little bit about social grace.

At least, that’s what I’m hoping  and praying for…

photo: Microsoft ClipArt