Before you get decide to permanently commit to being part of a blended family, there are many considerations and questions to consider and talk about ahead of time. There are some of the questions that I thought about, as well as some questions that I should have asked ahead of time and didn’t. The issues that I list are not necessarily in order of importance. Naturally, the most important issue in one blended family will not be the same as in another blended family. Some of these questions may not apply, as both people may not have children of their own.

- Decisions. How will household decisions be made? Does one person get the final say or will both of you be involved with making the decisions? Maybe both of you will want to be solely responsible for making decisions on behalf of your own kids?

- Discipline. Who will discipline the kids and how will the discipline be dealt? Will each bio-parent discipline their own kids? If there are kids in the household that aren’t yours, is your SO OK with you disciplining his/her kids? Do you want to discipline his/her kids? Who will be responsible for enforcing the consequences that may have been set for unacceptable behavior?

- Money. Will your money be joint? Is each parent responsible for their own child[rens] expenses, or will it come out of one pot? Do you need to consult with each other when taking money out for the kids or not?

- Schedule. When will the kids be visiting or are you or your SO the custodial parent? How is the issue of the kids’ space handled in the house? When will the two of you be able to spend time alone? Are you able to get a sitter or is one of the kids old enough to babysit the rest of the kids for a few hours?

- Chores. Who will be responsible for what chores? Are the kids old enough to do certain chores? Will the kids get a monetary reward for performing their chores? If so, an amount needs to be figured out and where that money will go, say, in a piggy bank or their own bank account.

- Driving. Who will be responsible for driving the kids around? Will each parent be responsible for driving their own kids around, or will the responsibility be shared, based on who is available at the time?

- Family Time. Will the family take a family vacation where everyone goes? What about going out to dinner, amusement parks, etc.?

The above are some things to think about and discuss before permanently committing to being part of a blended family. Of course, the answers to these questions can change over time, but at least you will have an idea of what to expect when starting out in a blended family.