Earlier this year, my mother-in-law treated myself and my two four year olds sons [as well as my sister in law and her two girls] to our very first trip to Disney. It was a, um, unique trip, to say the least. I’m not exactly sure how much I really remember. It’s kind of a blur. A giant blur of glitter, blinking lights, giant cartoon characters and people. Lots and lots and lots of people.

I learned a lot on that trip. And in the months that passed, I started to consider myself somewhat of an amateur expert on the whole experience. If you were within 50 feet of me and I heard you were thinking of going to visit the ‘Big Mouse’ you definitely heard from me, whether you wanted to or not.

That said, I’d like to share with you my ‘greatest hits’ list of observations on Disney survival. You may have been there, and done that and you probably know better, but look at it this way: You can always learn from other people’s mistakes.

• People are rude. But only because everybody dragged their kids out of bed to have breakfast with Mickey at 7 am (and that includes me).

• Four year olds don’t make great line waiters. Sometimes a FastPass just isn’t fast enough.

• Don’t take timid children on Peter Pan’s Flight if the last time you rode it was 8 years ago in California and you completely forgot that the entire ride was in the dark.

• Extra magic hours are just that. Magical.

• There is nothing sweeter then the sound of somebody else’s child throwing a temper tantrum (because, for once, its not yours).

• Always check your watch. You don’t want to get stuck in front of the castle when the fireworks start. People don’t take kindly to getting run over by a double-wide stroller.

• If you can’t drive a real car, you’re not going to be very good at driving a fake one either. [picture of kids driving]

• If you think your kids are going to like riding the rides, but dislike meeting the characters, you’ve probably got it all wrong.

And last but not least, in the end, the Teacups will always make everything better.

Have you made the fateful trip to Disney, or any other amusement park? How did you survive? Any horror or success storied you’d love to share?

Emily Hartley is an aspiring super mom and can be found blogging at Emily The Mom!