If you read many baby books or parenting websites, you’ll quickly learn that the average baby does such and such at ___ months. I say, average, schmaverage!

I am the blessed mother of two “late-developing” babies, at least in the physical department. My daughter crawled at almost 9 months and didn’t walk until 14 months (though I’m pretty sure she made up for any physical delays through sheer talkativeness!). My son didn’t crawl until he was 11 months old, and has just begun to truly walk independently at 17 months.

To many moms, this would be cause for concern. Doesn’t the “average” baby crawl by 7 or 8 months? Shouldn’t a normally developing baby walk by their first birthday, or at least shortly thereafter? If you had asked me these questions several years ago, my answer would have been quite different than it is today. My initial feelings were anxiety and worry for my baby’s development, concern over what others might think about my child, and even jealousy towards mother’s with little ones toddling around at 10 months old.

I was concerned that other people might think my child was less intelligent and treat them as such. Or that I was a bad parent and somehow not doing the right things to encourage my baby’s development. Or that maybe, my baby really was slow and that something truly was wrong.

As I’ve watched my youngest child along his own journey of hitting the developmental milestones, I’ve finally realized that it is perfectly ok for him to go along at his own pace. He is an individual, he is unique and he is not the “average” baby (because let’s face it- average doesn’t exist!). He is careful and cautious, he likes to test the waters before jumping in, and he’s often so entertained by his older sister that sometimes just watching her is enough action for the day. He knows that crawling is faster than taking faltering steps and that being carried by Mommy is the ultimate in luxurious living- I’d say that’s pretty smart, wouldn’t you?

And so I’ve restrained myself. I’ve held back, and offered only what I felt would be truly helpful and encouraging to him, but never pushed or rushed or demanded. I’ve observed silently, checking to see that the basic skills (coordination, balance, attempting to become mobile, etc.) were taking place steadily, albeit slowly. I’ve reminded myself (over and over) that he is not the same as other children, and he will crawl (or walk or run) when he is good and ready, and that doesn’t make him any less amazing or beautiful or bright.

I’m delighting in watching him toddle around this week. It’s been a long time coming, and he deserves every ounce of cheering and smiles and attention we’re giving him. There is nothing wrong with this gorgeous little boy of mine (or with your own little sweetheart who is also taking the journey at their own pace).

So to all the new or anxious moms out there, relax… Your beautiful baby is doing just fine, developing at their own unique pace. Let your doctor and your mother’s instinct tell you when there is something truly wrong, and otherwise just sit back and enjoy the ride of watching your delightful little person grow!

Are there any other moms out there that relate? What helped you to stop worrying about your baby’s development?

When not watching her son take his first steps or listening to her daughter sing made-up songs, Stephanie loves to blog about naturally inspired living at Keeper of the Home.