Maggie, 7: “Suzy said she won’t play with me.”

Brennan, age 12: “I thought Mary was my friend. I don’t understand why she would lie about me.”

Caity, age 14: “Maybe I can home-school for high school. I can’t stand all the drama with the girls in my class for four more years.”

Liz, age 15: “Friends seem to be staying friends for longer now. Kinda like the quick roll over is, well, over.”

Me, age, twenty~one squared: “Okay Lord, no more girlfriends. I mean it this time. Done.”

Sigh…It seems to me that no matter the age, the minute a girl starts to socialize with other girls, even her sisters, there is going to be some level of drama. This seems to be the case with all girls, not just some. Even girls that don’t seem to need a bestie, run into some sort of trouble with friends almost from the get go.

Take Mary and Martha where Martha complained about Mary to the Lord; or Mary running to tell Elizabeth about her own odd pregnancy–girlfriend relationships can be both complex and wonderful. Running into girlfriend trouble can become a focus in our lives. But I am convinced that according to the word of God, it doesn’t have to be. Some issues get resolved, others don’t–it’s a fact of life.

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” Proverbs 17:17

My daughters tend to give me a dirty look on that verse and truth be told, I’ve struggled with that one of late. That is

A Friend Loves At All Times

until the Lord showed me that the most loving thing I can do, is pray for the friend even if we “break up” and never become close again.  My mom used to have a list of people she prayed for every day, in her little black prayer note book. On one side was a list of people she was estranged from. If healing came, she crossed them off that list and put them back on to the “in good standing” list. Just before she died, all the names were crossed off the “estranged from” list, except one.  What an awesome legacy and example she left behind.

God created us to need each other. We–I– don’t always understand why. But if we allow Him the chance by extending ourselves in prayer for those whom we’ve drifted from, He can do some pretty amazing things.

At the height of my “no more besties” syndrome, I told my husband that I was going to share my day to day life with him alone–no one else. He gave me that deer caught in head lights look and made me promise not to share all of the ups and downs of my life cycle with him. Hmm. Looks like I will need a girlfriend or two after all.

Have you lost or drifted from a friend? Do you have an “in good standing” or estranged list? God, through your prayers and your willingness, can soothe and heal those girlfriend wounds. Why not give Him a try? You have nothing to lose.

***names of friends changed for all the obvious reasons.***