Hot Flashes and Nineteen Other Symptoms of Menopause
By thedailyblonde | Leave A Comment
By thedailyblonde | Leave A Comment
Hot Flashes and Nineteen Other Symptoms of Menopause
I got the good news about a year ago. My doctor told me I was in “peri-menopause”. Peri meaning what? I’m only going to be on the big old mood swing occasionally? Far be it for me to say, but I like some consistency in my life. I want my mood swings to be on a regular basis so they don’t sneak up and scare me. Or anyone else, for that matter.
Menopause. Figures there’s the word “men” in it. They’ve always caused me to pause. Never mind the pausing, they’ve caused me anxiety and mood swings. But then there have been a few who’ve just made me hot. Those are the men worth pausing for.
I thought I’d do a search on the symptoms of menopause (since apparently that’s where I’m headed) and came across a list of twenty symptoms. Twenty?? Isn’t one symptom enough?
- Hot flashes, night sweats and/or cold flashes: OK, I’ve got that!
- Clammy feeling: Not yet! I can’t wait!
- Irregular heart beat: Only if my phone rings at 3am
- Irritability: This has been going every month since I was eleven years old.
- Mood swings, sudden tears: Mood swings? Me? What are YOU TALKING ABOUT? I am PERFECTLY FINE! OK? Hey, want to snuggle?
- Trouble sleeping through the night: I am an insomniac. I wouldn’t know the difference.
- Heavier periods or shorter periods: That sounds like me aging: shorter and heavier.
- Loss of libido: This will never happen to me. Losing my sense of humor and my libido would be dreadful.
- Hair Growth: Not sure what this is about but there is a three letter word ladies: WAX
- Crashing fatigue: 24/7
- Anxiety, feeling ill at ease: I am anxious about the impending symptoms.
- Feelings of dread, apprehension, doom: I have feelings of doom because I read the list.
- Difficulty concentrating, disorientation, mental confusion: I’ve given birth to five children in 24 years. These symptoms were part of the parenting package.
- Disturbing memory lapses: I’ve had this for years. I just make lists now and try to keep track of where I put them.
- Incontinence, especially upon sneezing, laughing: I laugh often and haven’t peed my pants yet.
- Itchy, crawly skin: I only get this when I see my ex-husband.
- Aching, sore joints, muscles and tendons: This is the result of having my knee sliced open three times last year, not menopause.
- Gastrointestinal distress, indigestion, flatulence, nausea: I will not allow this to happen. Ever. OK, I’ll pick nausea if I have to pick one.
- Weight gain: This is something to look forward to!
- Changes in body odor: I assume this doesn’t mean I’ll be smelling like Chanel No.5 ?
I am excited about introducing my loved ones to my new phase of life!
Cheryl A. Phillips
Cheryl is a single mom to five awesome children. She has a passion for writing, laughter and all things chocolate. She shows her non sugar-coated side on her blog,
The Daily Blonde, and is a self-proclaimed Twitter addict.
The Daily Blonde, and is a self-proclaimed Twitter addict.
Come follow her on Twitter !
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ABOUT thedailyblonde
I've been writing since I could hold a pencil in my hand. I was born in New Jersey and grew up in Ma{read more}
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Cheer up! Once you adapt to all of these changes, you will find there are many positives to post menopause. You don’t have to shave as often. You can hang meat to cure in your house, because it is so cold, and you don’t have to walk with a wad of cotton between your legs. LOL
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The bad thing about menopause is that it is defined as one year without a period. So you never know that it is happening until it is over. The other symptons that occur in perimenopause can last for up to 5-7 years! Every time that i go over a month I start the clock ticking, only to find sporadic needs to rewind. Someday this will all be over and my guess is that we won’t remember much of it. (my mother doesn’t) It can’t be any worse than childbirth, now can it? (except in childbirth there is a clear beginning and end that lacks in this life stage.)